What Parents Can Say to Their Child Before Starting Psychological Therapy

It is important to find a way to speak openly with your child about going to see a Psychologist. This is because it will help them to be more receptive to the sessions. This is in large part as by talking to your child first, this gives them the opportunity to ask questions, express doubts and treats them as an active participant. This means they are more likely to feel as if this is their choice too and explicitly shows that you are interested in what they think and feel.

However, talking to your child about starting psychological therapy can feel difficult. You might feel a tension between wanting to let your child know about your concern for them, but also worry that what you say may lead them to feel worried, upset or even at fault in some way. For Primary school aged children, it can be helpful to explain that therapy is a place where children come to talk, play, draw, or think about their feelings with a grown-up whose job is to help them. You might tell them that when they are not feeling well in their body, then you have sometimes taken them to see the doctor who knows how to help them, sometimes with medication. You can say that a Psychologist is someone who helps when you might have painful or difficult thoughts and feelings, but not with pills, but by listening to what has been hard. Letting your child know that there are lots of ways that can show how they feel, through talking, play or art materials.

If it feels helpful, letting your child know that you are going to see the Psychologist together, not because you are cross or disappointed with them, or because they are in trouble, but because sometimes some feelings, worries, or experiences can be hard to manage alone, and that we need a bit of extra help.

Your child may feel concerned that they will be forced to talk, or feel that they will be expected to. It can be helpful to reassure them they need only share what they feel ready to do so and they can take their time. This will help to give your child a sense of feeling in control over what happens. Also, explaining that what they talk about and what happens in therapy is mostly private, with the Psychologist sharing information only if someone needs help to stay safe.

By offering calm, honest, and supportive messages, you can help create a sense of safety and curiosity about therapy, making it easier for their child to engage when they arrive.

A Short Script for Parents to Read to a Primary School before their first session:

I want to talk with you about something important, and you can ask questions at anytime.”

You know how everyone has feelings — happy ones, angry ones, worried ones, and sometimes really big ones? Grown-ups have them too.

Sometimes feelings get so big or tangled that they’re hard to understand or calm down on our own.

“You’re going to meet someone whose job is to help with feelings.”

This person is called a therapist. They work with children, and they know a lot about feelings, thoughts, and worries.

Their job is to help kids feel safer, calmer, and better understood — not to tell you off or make you change..

“What will it be like?”

When you go, you might talk a little, but you might also play, draw, build things, or use toys.

There’s no test, no scores, and no right or wrong way to do it. You don’t have to share anything until you’re ready. You can take your time, and you can say as much or as little as you like.

The person you’ll see is there to listen and help, not to tell you off or make you do anything.

“Why are we doing this?”

We’re doing this because we care about you and want to help things feel easier.

Just like some kids get help with reading or sports, some kids get help with feelings — and lots of children do this.

“What about privacy?”

What you talk about with the therapist is mostly private. That means it’s a safe space for you.

If something ever comes up that’s about keeping you safe, the therapist might talk with me — and that’s because grown-ups are there to help protect children.

“What if I’m not sure about it?”

That’s okay. You don’t have to love it right away. New things can feel strange at first.

You can tell me how it feels, and you can tell the therapist too. We’ll figure it out together.